A new account arrives!
by Shiary
Summary: Ifrit gets a Kwetter account. (For the winner of the mini King of Fire contest. Pikachubird from AO3. Prompt given was "Ifrit gets social media.")


Ifrit grumbled as he read through the requested information.

Username: Ifrit….. unavailable.

His brow twitched. "**Who dares use my name…**" He searched for the account. Refused to read the annoying warning about the content and clicked through to see what fool thought to use his hallowed name for their own purpose.

Ifrit's eyes widened at the first kwet pinned to the top. He didn't know whether to be furious or impressed.

"Ifrit? What are you… Wooh!" Noctis blushed and turned away as he got a look at the content on Ifrit's phone. "Sorry! I'll just…." Noctis hurried away, ignoring Ifrit's scramble to escape the kwetter page, and half hearted explanations.

As the door slammed shut behind Noctis, Ifrit groaned and slumped on the couch. Why did his kwetter impersonator have to be a damn porn star?

* * *

Two days later, after a rather embarrassing talk with an amused Ignis; Ifrit was verified as the proud owner of the kwetter account ** LordIfrit.** "So what will your first kwet be?" Asked an upside down Prompto as he finished following the new account.

Ifrit shrugged. "**Not sure. Noctis**-" He glared at the grinning prince. "- **suggested I take a selfie as 'proof' of who I am.**"

"Hey! It's a valid way to make sure people know it's really you." Noct shrugged as he grabbed a can of pop and dropped down by Prompto. "You could also say something like-" Noctis did his best impression of Ifrit. "- 'Worship me or die!' if you'd prefer." Prompto choked on his drink as he snorted. Ifrit couldn't tell if the blond was laughing at the Brat's horrible impression or the idea that Ifrit would say such a pathetic thing.

Before he could retaliate, Ifrit's phone was snatched by Ignis. "Actually, seeing as this is a verified account linked to the Crown. A first kwet has already been written by the Citadel's PR department." Within a few seconds, Ignis had written and kwetted said approved kwet. The phone was then returned to the pouting Infernian.

Ifrit grumbled under his breath about busybodies as he checked what 'he'd' just sent out. The message was short and to the point.

_**Let the Flames be rekindled. I am the Infernian. Bow down and worship me, Kwetter!**_

Ifrit's brow twitched again.

* * *

Ifrit threw his phone away as it chimed.

And chimed.

And chimed.

"**Why won't you stop!**" He roared at the stupid machine.

Ever since Ignis had sent out the first kwet from his kwetter account, Ifrit's phone had gone insane. Chime after chime of the ringtone he had once loved but now hated, it had not stopped!

Ifrit stomped over, grabbing the tiny, endlessly annoying thing. He was going to burn it! Fire started to flicker around the phone as a maniacal grin formed on Ifrit's face.

Only for him to end up soaked in water as Gladio emptied a flower vase on him. "Don't start another fire, you idiot!" He said, snatching the still dry phone from its prison. "Here. You just have to do this." Gladio poked at the screen a few times until blissful silence replaced the endless cacophony.

Gladio looked at the notifications and whistled. "Damn. A lot of people are sending you messages. And some of them are…" Gladio's eyes grew as he checked some of said messages. He dodged Ifrit's attempt at grabbing the phone with a chuckle.

"**Return it to me Amicitia**."

"Or what? You'll burn me? Come on Ifrit-" Gladio swung an arm around Ifrit's shoulders as he showed him one of the messages. "- you know I'm just messing around."

Ifrit grumbled as he snatched the phone back. "**This has not stopped since Ignis sent that first kwet. I cannot possibly answer all these messages.**"

Gladio shrugged. "So don't. Just choose a few, the ones that keep coming up, and answer those. Or you could go see the PR department. They manage most of the Official Accounts already."

"**Official accounts?**"

Gladio grinned. "Yup." He tapped something into Ifrit's phone then showed him the screen. "See? The Royal Family has its own Kwetter and about 10 PR guys to run it. Noct has his own private account but he's not allowed to give it out to anyone that doesn't pass a security check."

Ifrit grumbled as he snatched his phone back and quickly scrolled through it. Most of it were links to the news, statements about events as well as pictures of the royal family at said events. Ifrit tsked. This wasn't the kind of Kwetter he wanted.

"**The account is boring. Why would I wish to have such a thing?**" Ifrit grumbled, thumbing back to his own account. "**Just help me figure out how to deal with all these annoyances.**"

Gladio raised a brow. "What's this? An Astral as talented as you, asking for help?" He side-stepped the angry swipe from Ifrit and laughed. "Alright! Alright. Jeez… Just tell me what you want to know."

Ifrit glared at him for a few more moments before grumbling, "**How do you reply to kwets?**"

* * *

Prompto elbowed Noctis excitedly. "Dude! Did you see Ifrit's last kwet?" He chuckled as he thrust the phone in Noctis' face.

Noct grumbled as Prompto's interruption cause his death. "Come on Prom! It can't be that…" The controller hit the floor as Noctis saw what Prompto had. "Oh shit…." Noctis grabbed his own phone and winced at the message waiting.

Ignis had left three voicemails. Gladio and Clarus two lengthy texts. And a whopping fifteen IMPORTANT emails from the Crown's Public Relations department. Noctis dropped his head into a hand.

A moment later.

"Ifrit!? Get your ass here now!" Noctis roared.

By his side, Prompto gleefully rekwetted the selfie of a very _naked _Ifrit in what was clearly King Regis' bed.

* * *

A/N: This was the drabble for the mini King of Fire contest winner. Hope you enjoyed it!


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